March 02, 2009

The Fairytale Romances

A lot of my friends are still waiting for the fairytale romance. You know; the type of people who are still not cynical about love, relationship and the works. And I have all the respect for them. But the more I see of them, I realize that these people can be easily categorized into three – First, the favourite, I will meet my soul mate and when I see him/her I will know that this is the One person I have been looking for. Second, One day, he/she will come back to me and Third, the Indian version of a fairytale, I will meet him/her through parents/friends/matrimonial ads and then we will live happily ever after.

I am normally a harmless listener when such great analysis comes my way over the airwaves. I nod and appreciate their analysis. There’s no use disagreeing since according to most, I lack the intellectual and emotional capacity to talk over such matters. “Madhurjya, you are trying to make a joke, which, trust us, is not even funny.” And you know people are really upset when they call me by my real name.

However, since there’s no one shutting me down on this web page I think I can say what I feel like. First of all, what people ALWAYS forget about Fairytale romances is that there is always the evil stepmother, a dragon and sometimes even a handful of not so friendly goblins. So to reach happily ever after they have to go through a lot. And who has ever defined what ‘Happily ever after’ is? Who knows how happy the happily ever after really turns out to be? How happy are people when they are discussing aloo, bhindi and who to call home for dinner?

Finding a house to stay in is pretty much the same. In fact, I would say deciding on room mates is even more like getting into a relationship. It is scary to say the least. So since I have no “first hand knowledge” of soul mates, let me discuss room mates.

I realized somewhere pretty early in my life that as much of an extrovert I might be, I love my “me time” when no one would disturb me and I could do anything I want, probably just having an afternoon siesta in place of going to classes but still a complete “me time.” But I needed to know that human civilization was there at arm’s length if needed. I realized that I could be the Old Man in the Sea and have no issues with that. After all, seas reach the shores sometime.

So when my flat mate informed me that he was planning to leave, I was sure that I wanted to move into a place just by myself, close to friends, yet a place that ensures that I have my “me time” But as I started searching, finding such a place seemed tough. Still I persisted and was almost sure of where I wanted to be. But then G intervened and asked me to move in with him at hot and happening Bandra.

I have never been finicky about where I live. And yes, since the days of staying at Motappanpalya in Bangalore and looking at the beautiful houses at Indiranagar, I have allowed friends to make the decisions for me. This time was no different. There are some people in this world I trust without a thought. G being one of them, I had just asked to see the house once, so that I could figure out how far it is from the station. Just like an arranged marriage, if I may draw an analogy. A friend currently in Calcutta was completely baffled by my choice. “I did not think you were going to move in with someone,” he thundered over the phone.

By moving in, I have done two things. First, I have lost one of my “run away to” zones. G’s house was always one of the 3 places in Mumbai where I could run away, feeling safe and secure. Now I am left with only 2. Secondly, my biggest issue with friends turning their friendship into a relationship is that I have seen friendship always being sacrificed at the altar of love. They no longer stay friends. Well, people manage to have a great time with each other but something is lost from their combined life. The easiest way to lose a friend is therefore to fall in love with her or move in with him or vice versa if you are a woman. What happens here is something that only the future can tell.

Like in the beginning of any relationship, I remember my old one. I’ll miss the peace and quiet of Wadala. I’ll miss seeing the sun set on those rare weekends that I would be at home. Bandra Linking Road will be a completely different life and frankly I am freaked out.

The balcony runs around our rooms. Bandra shows no sign of going to sleep and neither do I.


Addy said...

Well. I must confess I still believe in fairytale romance. However, I meet them and I meet them again and nothing seems to tell me anything! :(

Shreya said...

You are in Bandra now! Good for you :D

Akanksha said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

damn bugger u moved to bandra linking road!!!

Soumya Sen said...

I guess Addy has been meeting a lot of new people on Castro Street.

Madhurjya (Banjo) said...

@ Addy - Hear the sounds of silence :)

@ Shreya and Anon 1 - Well technically it's Khar but let's not tell that to the non Mumbaikars.

@Akanksha - He reads my blog. So I guess he will. And we discussed :D

@Soumya - there's a Castro Street in the US? Really?

Gaurav Jain said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

How much rent do u pay? After all Bandra is the lair of filmstars?

Madhurjya (Banjo) said...

@ Anon - I almost take a loan to pay the rent. Sigh

Namy said...

Hey, you're in Bandra now?! We're still at the same place...let's meet up?