The Times They are a Changin’

And constantly… A left our house, got married, started off on his own, Sibs quit her job to leave Mumbai with hubby, bearded man quit too and will leave Mumbai for Gurgaon in the next few days and I stand at the crossroads looking at all the change that’s happening around me. I have always loved change as that added a strong sense of vitality in my life. But sometimes, things happen too fast and you are left gasping for breath as emotions choke you. The support system must be there at these times to help you up on your feet. But what if the system is compromised?

Change at times is overwhelming. It just blows your brains out once they start happening one after the other. The knowledgeable embrace them, others sulk. Perspectives change too. Firebrands mellow down, people learn to forgive as memories get hazier. The vision gets unclear as eyes moisten up to bid a sister goodbye.

That’s when books and music come in handy. You begin to read again, be it about Babur, Napoleon or for that matter Draupadi. And you realize that it’s something no one can ever change. So for the love of my life, my books I just have to say, “tomar jonne surjo dube geleo, raat hoyni amar konodin.. tomar jonne mon kharaper rate, sokal hoyeche joldi porer din.”

Thank God however for things that do not change. My best friend since 1989 calls me up before Germany matches to ensure he reminds me that no matter what happens ultimately Argentina will win. I still have the gall to saunter into Taj Lands End post midnight dressed in Tees and Tracks. I get scolded by CCA partner for making sexist remarks. Supposedly saying “Watching Football and not conversing is guy thing” is sexist. Well maybe.

MLTR visits India and I go to hear them play. The same old songs, the same old Magic. I’m still not an actor and not a star and I still don’t have my own car. Anyway, the Veg Grilled Sandwich at Nanak Sai stills sneaks in enough butter to make anyone go crazy over it, Peshawari forces you to eat with your hands and Bhajji still entertains more with the bat than with the ball.

In this crazy world, stability is necessary at times.

Random Musings

Change is inevitable and yet we all fear it. We fear moving out of our safe cocoons, we fear the loss of stability but most of all we fear the unknown. Even after the advent of quantum mechanics, we do not understand the Uncertainty Principle of life. It is extremely easy to preach the maxims of being flexible when things are going your away. But suddenly when you come face to face with the unknown you begin to falter.

I walk a tightrope between conformity and bohemianism. I look back to see the snares following me, serpentine in their manoeuvres ready to entrap the spirit that was once free. Rules seem safer. The worldly wisdom seems profitable when followed and yet there is a burning desire to go back to the days of the cave dwellers when man was one with the nature, when man hunted with the beasts of the night, when man was free.

I smile today even when I know Paradise has been lost and chances of regaining it are few and far between. I smile for I know in the cycle of life days change into nights and back to days, seasons change freezing me to my bones once and then draining my parched lips of the last traces of moisture. I smile for I still believe. I believe because I still have hope.

Hope for what? The wait for what? I do not know my answers. But I do know one thing. Uncertainty and Change - That’s what the cycle of life is all about.

Before we begin

It's not wrong to chicken out. What's wrong is to accept it and never try to change.